Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Butterflies and all

As my friends ad myself get older I have started to realise that the more we date the less and less you meet someone totally amazing who gives you the butterflies in your stomach when you see them, makes you feel light hearted and silly and someone who calls you all those silly little names that make you feel like your young again and this is your first true crush.

Dating has made me forget all about the butterflies and make me realise the feeling of eating the same mediocre dish, you know what to expect, nothing special, and boring but nescary in order to survive, I say nescary cause no one wants to be alone, dating is even compulsory to find someone who will ultimately be a companion if nothing else.

Rediscovering the butterflies was by pure accident for me and the sad thing is I wasn't even the one with the butterflies. All I had to do was turn to someone who is an exceedingly important part of my existence and see their reaction to a message and a phone call and it made me so deliriously happy that I actually started to believe that maybe I've been to harsh a critique on some of the dishes I've reviewed.

No matter how dry and tasteless my next meal seems I am reassured by the same group of optimists that there is indeed a hearty meal to be had if I am patient. There are, supposedly, "…heaps of great single people out there." –whenever I here this I want to be shown one as living proof and not a delirious hope that I may have to settle. I'm getting totally off track here though.

Butterflies, that's what I want, I don't want someone to sweep me off my feet and make me live happily ever after, I just want to meet a nice individual who can give me those warm feelings I used to get when I really liked a descent person, you know you think about them and what they are doing. The 'grown up' version of butterflies is love apparently and I have been there done that but honest to god, I'd rather have a positive experience of butterflies with someone awesome and have it leave me then getting my heart broken, yeah it sounds sappy and romantic and what not but its true.

So everyone who has gotten the butterflies lately should tell me all about it, because I'm starting to think that the butterflies, like youth, eventually leave you.


At 8:55 am, August 14, 2007, Anonymous Zilly said...

It has nothing to do with age, Ms. Pineapple, it has to do with becoming jaded, guarded in your relationships, going from seeing the glass half filled to being half empty. It comes with buying what you are told is the inevitable life you must settle into and becoming less and less hopeful. You are smart. Look beyond the obvious. Don't give up the best things in your life, madam.

At 8:56 am, August 14, 2007, Anonymous The Illustrious Miss Claire Connors said...

I still get butterflies, especially when I'm near my boy (it's been 6 weeks, and he's still around. Wohoo). I suggest if you want the butterflies to return, act your shoe size, not your age, and if you want to be all old and adult like, you'll lose the butterflies. The butterflies don't die off, they just hide.

At 8:57 am, August 14, 2007, Anonymous Bettina said...

Don't worry Bee, butterflies do evade the proverbial bug-zapper...they may run away and hide, but they'll be back when you least expect it...even in long term relationships, things aren't as "old" as you think =P

At 7:12 pm, August 14, 2007, Blogger Urkat said...

Bee, Just when you think you've become "butterfly proof," someone will come along to prove you wrong. But eventually you'll have to realize that they too have feet of clay and aren't as wonderful as advertised.

At 10:00 am, August 15, 2007, Blogger Urkat said...

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At 10:03 am, August 15, 2007, Blogger Urkat said...

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At 10:06 am, August 15, 2007, Blogger Urkat said...

By Tré Taylor

In your life, you'll make note of a lot of people. Ones with whom you shared something special, ones who will always mean something. There's the one you first kissed, the one you first loved, the one you lost your virginity to, the one you put on a pedestal, the one you're with... and the one that got away. Who is the one that got away? I guess it's that person with who everything was great, everything was perfect, but the timing was just wrong. There was no fault in the person, there was no flaw in the chemistry, but the cards just didn't fall the right way, I suppose.

I believe in the fact that ending up with someone, finding a longtime partner that is, does not lie merely in the other person. I can actually argue that an equal part, or maybe even the greater part, has to do with the matter of timing. It has to do with you being ready to settle down and commit to someone in a way that goes beyond the little niceties of giddy romance.

How often have you gone through it without even realizing it? When you're not ready to commit in that mature manner, it doesn't matter who you're with, it just doesn't work. Small problems become big; inconsequentials become deal breakers simply because you're not ready and it shows. It's not that you and the person you're with are no good; it's just that it's not yet right, and little things become the flashpoint of that fact.

Then one day you're ready. You really are. And when this happens you'll be ready to hang with someone. He or she may not be the most perfect, they might not be the brightest star of romance to ever have burned in your life, but it'll work because you're ready. It'll work because it's the right time and you'll make it work. And it'll make sense, it really will. So that day comes when you're finally making sense of things, and you find yourself to be a different person. Things are different, your approach is different, you finally understand who you are and what you want, and you've become ready because the time has truly arrived. And mind you, there's no telling when this day will come. Hopefully you're single but you could be in a long-term relationship, you could be married with three kids, it doesn't matter. All you know is that you've changed, and for some reason, the one that got away, is the first person you think about.

You'll think about them because you'll wonder, "What if they were here today?" You'll wonder, "What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?" That's what the one that got away is. The biggest "What if?" you'll have in your life. If you're married, you'll just have to accept the fact that the one that got away, got away. Believe me, no matter how fairy tale you think your marriage is, this can happen to the best of us. But hopefully you're mature enough to realize that you're already with the one you're with and this is just another test of your commitment, one which will just strengthen your marriage when you get past it.

Sure, you'll think about him/her every so often, but it's alright. It's never nice to live with a "might have been," but it happens. Maybe the one that got away is the one who's already married. In which case it's the same thing. You just have to accept and know that your memories of that person will probably bring a nice little smile to your lips in the future when you're old and gray and reminiscing. But if neither of that is the case, then it's different. What do you do if it's not yet too late?

Simple...find him, find her. Because the very existence of a "one that got away" means that you'll always wonder, what if you got that one? Ask him out to coffee, ask her out to a movie, it doesn't matter if you've dropped in from out of nowhere. You'd be surprised, you just might be "the one that got away" as well for the person who is your "the one that got away." You might drop in from out of nowhere and it won't make a difference. If the timing is finally right, it'll all just fall into place somehow and you know, I'm thinking, it would be a great feeling, in the end, to be able to say to someone, "Hey you, you're the one that ALMOST got away."

At 3:18 pm, August 17, 2007, Anonymous Heather said...

naww those feelings are the best! they make you all happy inside and out

my ex-bf gives me those feelings and i feel like a giddy lil 12yr old school girl, i love it when he calls just for a chat or to hear my voice young love is great.

btw we broke up because he moved to perth so the feelings are still here but i spose thats a whole other story for another time...

BUT butterflies in the stomach are awesome and they should never fade out of our lives completely


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